Every new year is an unknown year—perhaps that is why we gather to celebrate the New Year with friends, to ease to fear of the unknown, to trick us into thinking we won’t actually be alone when facing this curiously unsettling, mystery year.
The truth is that we will face the year alone, like we always have. We walk our own path through life, no one walks it for us.
2016 is going out like a lamb: a lamb that is being slowly and brutally slaughtered. I am eagerly anticipating 2017 coming in like a fierce lion, shaking yesterday’s dust from her short mane.
I live for my daily time in the wilderness, exploring forests. It has been a long time since I have been able to walk in a forest and it is torture–my right foot is fractured and is taking forever and a day to heal.
I was okay for the first 6 weeks, toughed it out; what’s six weeks after six months of pain? But the six weeks ended and I find myself in worse rather than better shape than when I started the air cast (left ankle is now sprained from carrying an impossibly heavy backpack while hobbling around on crutches each day).
However, I believe that life is the greatest teacher, so whatever comes my way, I look for lessons. This is where I am meant to be at this moment in my life, so what must I learn from this?
Today, for a huge treat, I took a short walk along a favourite local creek. Mill Creek winds its way through rare inland temperate rainforest and is surrounded by arid, ponderosa pine covered, bluffs—heaven to me as cedar and ponderosa are my favourite trees.
I only have a few more hours to be bewildered, like the lamb; I must rise somehow and enter 2017 like a lion. I will meditate on this, sometime in the next few hours before midnight arrives, and hopefully come up with some guidance as I will be entering the unknown year ahead whether or not I am ready for it. Being immobile is perhaps one of my greatest fears and it has come to pass for much longer than I anticipated.
The first thing I have learned (while writing this) is that this is a mild fear to manifest and battle compared to what life could throw at me and yet, it does take courage to survive it simply because I an extremely mobile-loving person. Why walk when you can run? has been an unconscious/conscious motto of mine forever.
Happy Unknown Year! May the lion shake her mane tomorrow.